30 May 2010 @ 02:43 am
Detective Ray Vecchio, IMP!  

"I can't believe I did that I can't believe I did that I can't believe!" Ray flapped his hands and high-tailed it out of the stable, hopping around in circles and visibly shuddering. "I can't believe I did that!"

There was a reason why horses weren't man's best friend and that reason was glaringly obvious to Ray. They stunk. And tried to kick him. And head-butt him whenever his back was turned.

Huffing out a deep breath, Ray pinched two fingers and pulled off his gloves, work done for the morning. He'd forgotten how sucky it was getting up early to tend to two spoiled sets of hooves, and he definitely hadn't appreciated the time in-between these stints enough, when he'd been able to sleep in and not smell of manure. He thanked God he lived alone, otherwise his roommates might have thought there was something wrong with his own bowels...

Tossing the gloves on the floor, Ray looked himself over, checking to make sure he wasn't too cruddy. He'd leave the saddling up and...whatever else needed to be done to Asher and spend the time psyching himself up instead. The faster he learned how to control those things, the less time he'd have to play care-giver.

"C'mooon," he called out, swinging his hands together and shaking out his legs, a clear sign of the nerves he was trying to disguise with over-confidence. "Don't bother with a seat, I'll do it bareback if I have to."
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[identity profile] speakscanadian.livejournal.com on June 7th, 2010 11:43 am (UTC)
Ray let out a small grating noise at the back of his throat and looked between the two animals. Why couldn't some people look beyond the deliberately short hair on his head?

"Unlike Beau, I'm not trying to sleep with a horse. Real people aren't always as shallow as him." He glanced up at Asher. "Or you."
asher_talos: Happy little vampire[personal profile] asher_talos on June 7th, 2010 03:22 pm (UTC)
"I'm sure all the she-horses on the island are relieved..." Asher definitely was; he let this guy near his horses, so it was nice to know they weren't in any danger. "And if that helps you sleep at night, you keep on believing it."
[identity profile] speakscanadian.livejournal.com on June 7th, 2010 03:57 pm (UTC)
"Least people don't mistake me for Cujo when I yawn," Ray shot back, figuring he was allowed to focus on that particular flaw since Asher seemed to stick with hair when insulting him. "Or Stanley Kowalski. But that's 'cause you share the bad haircut thing rather than the teeth thing." Credit where credit was due - Kowalski's teeth were normal.
asher_talos: Amused[personal profile] asher_talos on June 7th, 2010 04:49 pm (UTC)
"Other than your attempts at insults," -- all of which were unsuccessful as far as Asher was concerned -- "I can honestly say no one's ever mistaken me for a St. Bernard, just a vampire. That's okay, though, the eyesight probably follows the hair."
[identity profile] speakscanadian.livejournal.com on June 7th, 2010 04:59 pm (UTC)
"You're also smug, arrogant," Ray counted them off on one hand, his other clinging tightly to the reins, "and..." Really difficult to insult. "And childish." He looked far too proud to have thought up a third thing, his finger pointing at Asher in triumph. "And many more things I don't have the time to list." Or the brain capacity.
asher_talos: Show me your teeth[personal profile] asher_talos on June 7th, 2010 06:49 pm (UTC)
"I don't consider the first two insults, and does listing all that make you any less childish than I supposedly am?" He was pretty sure they both knew the answer to that, even if Ray wouldn't be openly admitting it.
[identity profile] speakscanadian.livejournal.com on June 7th, 2010 11:56 pm (UTC)
"Yes, it does," Ray answered, then clucked his tongue and dug his heels in, taking off on another trot. He kept the counting in his head this time and found the rhythm quite quickly. It seemed when he wasn't thinking too much it all came to him a lot more easily. Asher might be many things but at least he wasn't a bad teacher. "What're you calling number three?"
asher_talos: Mellow[personal profile] asher_talos on June 8th, 2010 06:59 am (UTC)
"Won't know until it's here. I can't exactly tell what sex it is by the may she's carrying," he answered, mildly impressed that Ray was able to keep time and ask a question all at once. That was a step up from being able to chew gum and walk simultaneously. "Maybe Bijou if it's a girl. Not sure about a boy."
[identity profile] speakscanadian.livejournal.com on June 9th, 2010 01:13 am (UTC)
"Bijou," Ray echoed, tossing it around in his head for a moment. "Sticking with the French theme, huh? So how 'bout uh...for a boy, mind..." He raised his voice as he moved a bit further away, kind of like a duckling exploring without its mother for the first time. "Boris. Or Bastien. Oh, hey, if it comes out the right color, call it Bayard." Ray circled back round, speeding up as he returned. He grinned. "Or Bonaparte."
asher_talos: The fuck?[personal profile] asher_talos on June 9th, 2010 02:20 am (UTC)
"Uh... how about you keep those for when the island throws a horse at you?" If that did happen, Asher wouldn't be able to help himself from feeling a little bad for the animal. As if having Ray as an owner wasn't bad enough for it, it was already guaranteed to have a crappy name, too. At least it probably wouldn't have to live with it long.
[identity profile] speakscanadian.livejournal.com on June 9th, 2010 11:03 pm (UTC)
"Nah, I got better names for my own stuff." And if Ray ever did end up the unfortunate owner of something live and not human, he'd probably call it Benny and have done with it. "I gave you the rejects. When's she due?" Hopefully not too soon because Ray suspected it wasn't easy to ride a pregnant horse near full term and he still had a lot to be taught. A horseless teacher wasn't much good, though Ray wouldn't be averse to seeing Asher ride an imaginary one for educational purposes.
asher_talos: Doubting your intelligence[personal profile] asher_talos on June 10th, 2010 02:19 am (UTC)
"It's nice to know you care..." If nothing else, at last he knew those names sucked. "Not till the very end of this year or maybe early next. Why? You wanna be around to cut the umbilical cord?"
[identity profile] speakscanadian.livejournal.com on June 10th, 2010 03:10 am (UTC)
"A Christmas miracle..." Ray replied in a day-dreamy voice before giving Asher a pointed look. "Maybe you should call it Jesus." His tone changed very quickly at the mention of icky things. "Uh, no thank you. I'll stand at the back with the camcorder, telling her to push. Doing all the Lamaze breathing and stuff."
asher_talos: Then what happened?[personal profile] asher_talos on June 10th, 2010 03:33 am (UTC)
"Jesus isn't French and doesn't start with a B." Not that those were the only reasons he wasn't going to use that particular name. "So, essentially, you're useless? Good to know."
[identity profile] speakscanadian.livejournal.com on June 10th, 2010 03:44 am (UTC)
Ray thought for a long, hard moment, letting Beau wander as he wished. "Bejesus is both," he pointed out, making sure to say it with a French accent. "And moral support isn't useless." He'd never been to a human birth before so he sure as hell wouldn't know what to do at a horse one. "Maybe Belle would be better off with your sister as a birthing partner though. Female to female."
asher_talos[personal profile] asher_talos on June 10th, 2010 04:11 am (UTC)
"Clearly, you haven't seen my sister interact with other females. Or males. Or animals in general..." Asher chose to ignore the idiotic suggestion, on account of it being idiotic. "Pretty much anything living."
[identity profile] speakscanadian.livejournal.com on June 10th, 2010 04:29 am (UTC)
"Really," Ray commented neutrally, case notes immediately flooding back to his mind. He'd seen her talking to Sally once but they'd both had scowls on their faces pretty much the entire time. "She rubs everyone up the wrong way, huh?" Like a concentrated version of Asher, he figured. "I've not had much personal experience of her." Professional was another matter.
asher_talos: Could I BE less interested?[personal profile] asher_talos on June 10th, 2010 04:38 am (UTC)
"Do not do that," Asher warned. It went without saying, but he hadn't been born yesterday, and had more than his fair share of experience dealing with cops. Maybe Ray was the first one in a long while what wasn't crooked, but it didn't matter. "I will kick you off that fucking horse if you start over analyzing."
[identity profile] speakscanadian.livejournal.com on June 10th, 2010 11:59 am (UTC)
"Just making conversation," Ray replied as innocently as he could manage, and he resisted the temptation of teasing Beau away from Belle and out of Asher's reach. "How's she doing after her run in with...what was it that attacked her again?" He knew Asher wasn't stupid enough to fall for it or give him any answers but it didn't stop Ray from asking.
asher_talos: Happiness in misery[personal profile] asher_talos on June 10th, 2010 01:35 pm (UTC)
A whole lot of glaring is all that made up Asher's response, and he suppressed the urge to curse him out. With only so much restraint to go around, he pulled Belle off on a walk around away from Beau. He could probably get away with kicking a cop off a horse is said cop had it coming, but strangling that same cop with his own reins might not have gone over so well.
[identity profile] speakscanadian.livejournal.com on June 10th, 2010 03:59 pm (UTC)
Ray wasn't dumb; he had his suspicions about who was involved. He just had no clue what the hell had happened and it bugged him probably about much as all the questions bugged Asher.

"Come on!" He called out, thinking it maybe wasn't a good idea to piss off the teacher. Who knew what he could make Beau do? It took Ray awhile to get him to turn and exclamations of "Follow that horse!" and pointing at Belle didn't do much to help. "It's the great unsolved mystery of the year," he called again, making slow progress at catching up, "you can't get angry at my being curious. Would you be angry if I asked you about Bigfoot? No." Granted Bigfoot wasn't Asher's sister but the logic made sense to Ray.
asher_talos: Could I BE less interested?[personal profile] asher_talos on June 10th, 2010 05:30 pm (UTC)
"It happened last year." January, technically, but that was practically December, which was definitely last year. To Asher, that obviously meant it was about time Ray found himself a far more current unsolved mystery. Preferably one that didn't involve his little sister. "And you're not asking me about Bigfoot."
[identity profile] speakscanadian.livejournal.com on June 10th, 2010 05:51 pm (UTC)
Ray thought about arguing but he knew a lost cause when he saw one. "Alright, I'll drop it. Sorry." He waved a fly away from his face and sighed heavily. "I wasn't even asking if she was okay as a cop. I was asking as a...I dunno what I was asking as." A fellow older brother maybe. A concerned citizen. Something told Ray neither of those would fly well with Asher either.
asher_talos[personal profile] asher_talos on June 10th, 2010 06:48 pm (UTC)
"The hell you weren't." That level of delusional was entirely too similar to the level of one roommate in particular that Asher had to deal with. Deja vu was something he could really do without. "If you're going to BS me, at least make it somewhat believable."
[identity profile] speakscanadian.livejournal.com on June 10th, 2010 10:21 pm (UTC)
Ray's eyes rolled heavenward and stayed there. "You know what, you should be grateful I got that case. You think if Vimes had had it he'd be off your backs by now? No." Without even taking into account his dislike of vampires. "You're lucky I buried it. It'd only take one cop on this island to take a look, have the same unanswered questions as me and re-open it, so me asking how your sister's doing will be the least of your worries if that ever happens." The only reason Ray could see that it would was if either of the Talos siblings got into trouble again, but by the way Asher had described Danica's social skills, that didn't seem too far off the horizon.
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